Wisdom In Marriage & Divorce

The most detailed law in the Quran is divorce, nowadays people have made a joke out of this talak, talak, talak, what you’re going to do now, and then two hours later I didn’t mean it, it didn’t count, let’s go find a Mufti, right, because we made a joke out of though by the way isn’t that making the ayat of Allah a joke. it is right and you know what’s even crazier, this is I don’t know if this is just pakistanis or what but a lot of people have told me oh it doesn’t count unless you say it three times, who told you that what book are you reading, did you are you learning Islam from a comic book.

This is now our final section and this is where we’re going to spend quite a bit of time, I explained already to you the difference between law and wisdom in the last session, right law is black and white and wisdom is kind of situation by situation, but now we have to combine the two of them. we have to actually look at the two of them together, you might not know this but the laws in the Quran, the one law in the Quran that is talked about in more detail than any other law, and I’m not talking about worship, I’m talking about a law that has people people’s dealings, the most detailed law in the Quran is divorce. there’s no law that Allah talks about in more detail in the entire Quran, than he does about divorce.

If somebody asked the question what does the Quran say about a happy marriage, there’s like two ayahs, and then if you ask what’s the Quran say about divorce, there are several pages and then a Surah on top of that and then other references. why and the Quran is silent on relationship advice, except very little, this is the Ayah rum is the Ayah every some little bit of hints in the ayat of Ramadan, bits and pieces here and there, but the majority when you talk about divorce, oh my God, you know why, it’s as if it’s as if I by here’s the principle

وَيُعَلِّمُكُم مَّا لَمْ تَكُونُوا تَعْلَمُونَ
[2:151]

Allah teaches you what you couldn’t possibly learn yourself or know yourself. Which means Allah knows that you know how to have a good relationship, you don’t need some outside help to figure out how to have a good marriage, but what you don’t know how to do is to have a peaceful divorce, that you don’t know, you know how to keep things good, but you don’t know how to handle the situation when things go bad that you couldn’t figure out yourself there I will give you exhaustive explanation, and so Allah gives exhaustive explanation about what should happen when somebody’s getting divorced. The thing is these are you can call them the laws of divorce.

So this part of the Quran is kitab isn’t it, it’s we’re going to look at a little bit of that I mean we can’t go through all of that because it’s huge it’s a very big subject but I’m going to show you just a one small sampling of it,

اَلطَّلَاقُ مَرَّتٰنِ​ فَاِمۡسَاكٌ ۢ بِمَعۡرُوۡفٍ اَوۡ تَسۡرِيۡحٌ ۢ بِاِحۡسَانٍ​ ؕ وَلَا يَحِلُّ لَـکُمۡ اَنۡ تَاۡخُذُوۡا مِمَّآ اٰتَيۡتُمُوۡهُنَّ شَيۡـــًٔا اِلَّاۤ اَنۡ يَّخَافَآ اَ لَّا يُقِيۡمَا حُدُوۡدَ اللّٰهِ​ؕ فَاِنۡ خِفۡتُمۡ اَ لَّا يُقِيۡمَا حُدُوۡدَ اللّٰهِۙ فَلَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيۡهِمَا فِيۡمَا افۡتَدَتۡ بِهٖؕ​ تِلۡكَ حُدُوۡدُ اللّٰهِ فَلَا تَعۡتَدُوۡهَا ​ۚ​ وَمَنۡ يَّتَعَدَّ حُدُوۡدَ اللّٰهِ فَاُولٰٓٮِٕكَ هُمُ الظّٰلِمُوۡنَ‏ ٢٢٩

فَاِنۡ طَلَّقَهَا فَلَا تَحِلُّ لَهٗ مِنۡۢ بَعۡدُ حَتّٰى تَنۡكِحَ زَوۡجًا غَيۡرَهٗ ​ؕ فَاِنۡ طَلَّقَهَا فَلَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيۡهِمَآ اَنۡ يَّتَرَاجَعَآ اِنۡ ظَنَّآ اَنۡ يُّقِيۡمَا حُدُوۡدَ اللّٰهِ​ؕ وَتِلۡكَ حُدُوۡدُ اللّٰهِ يُبَيِّنُهَا لِقَوۡمٍ يَّعۡلَمُوۡنَ‏ ٢٣٠

وَإِذَا طَلَّقْتُمُ النِّسَاءَ فَبَلَغْنَ أَجَلَهُنَّ فَأَمْسِكُوهُنَّ بِمَعْرُوفٍ أَوْ سَرِّحُوهُنَّ بِمَعْرُوفٍ ۚ وَلَا تُمْسِكُوهُنَّ ضِرَارًا لِّتَعْتَدُوا ۚ وَمَن يَفْعَلْ ذَٰلِكَ فَقَدْ ظَلَمَ نَفْسَهُ ۚ وَلَا تَتَّخِذُوا آيَاتِ اللَّهِ هُزُوًا ۚ وَاذْكُرُوا نِعْمَتَ اللَّهِ عَلَيْكُمْ وَمَا أَنزَلَ عَلَيْكُم مِّنَ الْكِتَابِ وَالْحِكْمَةِ يَعِظُكُم بِهِ ۚ وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ وَاعْلَمُوا أَنَّ اللَّهَ بِكُلِّ شَيْءٍ عَلِيمٌ ٢٣١

Very brief commentary okay when a man and a woman are married then a man can pronounce his divorce and still be able to take her back twice, that can happen at two occasions two separate occasions, nowadays people have made a joke out of this talak talaq, talaq, what you gonna do now, and then two hours later, I didn’t mean it, it didn’t count, let’s go find a Mufti, right because we made a joke out of though by the way isn’t that making the ayat of Allah a joke, it is right, and you know what’s even crazier, this is I don’t know if this is just pakistanis or what but a lot of people have told me oh it doesn’t count unless you say it three times. who told you that what book are you reading?
did you are you learning Islam from a comic book?

This is psychosis, Allah says revocable reversible divorce can happen on two occasions. you can end the marriage that it’s still reversible on two occasions, then he says listen carefully, فَإِمْسَاكٌ بِمَعْرُوفٍ
then after that happens any one of those he says I divorce you, and then he thinks about it they think about it they talk about it, and he says you know well let’s try again, he says then take back hold on to the marriage, but hold on to it with decency, hold on to it with dignity, with decent with goodness.

Now holding on to it with goodness, let me ask you does that sound like law or wisdom, immediately after the law Allah switched over to what wisdom, because I cannot check if I’m taking back for good intention, in a good way or not that’s not something to lock and judge are not directly أو تسريح بإحسان
or let go beautifully.

He says Let Go what beautifully, Quran is saying that, Quran is saying that, you know when divorce happens it gets really ugly, right and now Allah is telling you listen you don’t know how to handle the situation I’m telling you do everything you can to let go in a way that is beautiful, and what happens a lot of times is one person fears Allah and says I want to let go in a way that’s beautiful the other one says let me see how, I’ll show you beautiful right او تسريح باحسان
then he says أن تأخذوا مما آتيتموهن شيئا it is not knowledge talking to the men, he says it’s not Halal for you you’re not allowed to take anything back that you gave to them.

If you gave her a car, if you give her a ring, she’d give her a necklace, if you bought her a PS5, right because you bought yourself a PS5 free, but you said this is your eat present.

So officially you made it hurry present I’m just playing it so it doesn’t go, you know I’m just keeping it, if you gave it to her Allah says it’s not Halal for you to take back anything that you had given to them, okay.